Note: Previous Incarnations of the Random Review can be found here.

Because I am nothing if not a follower. The objects of my review will be picked whenever my cell phone goes off.

Men of the Otherworld by Kelley Armstrong

I have to admit straight upfront that I'm not entirely unbiased here - this series holds more than a little nostalgic value for me, and the author once critiqued my writing. But really, who says that reviewers have to be objective? That's just boring.

Ahem. So anyway, the book - originally published on her website for free - follows two of the male characters from Armstrong's popular Women of the Otherworld series, Jeremy and Clayton Danvers. Both are werewolves, and they belong to the same pack, but they're otherwise radically different: Clay started out as a feral werewolf child after being bitten, and was rescued by Jeremy, who managed to raise him to be a functioning member of society. (Sort of.) Jeremy is the pack alpha, who got his position through wits and intelligence (as opposed to the previous Alphas, who just killed their way to the top.) The book begins with Jeremy's conception and birth in 1946, follows Clay's youth and adolesence as Jeremy becomes Alpha, beating out his father (who lurks in the background of the novel, being a spectacular douchebag) and ends with Jeremy's discovery of his maternal origins. The stories about Jeremy and his mother bookend the two novellas that are narrated by Clayton; both the short stories and novellas are told in first-person.

Thankfully, I'm not going to have to excuse any nostalgic fondness for bad writing, because the book is genuinely good. Armstrong's strength, and what makes her stand out in the mire of urban fantasy, has always been her ability to create characters who are people first and supernaturals second, and this definitely applies here. Both the protagonists and the supporting cast are genuinely likeable (alas, my fourteen-year-old crush on Jeremy has not died with the years) and the reader is genuinely invested in what happens to them - even though I already know what happens, as the bulk of the book has already been spoiled by the main series. Nevertheless, I thoroughly enjoyed reading it, and don't regret the money I paid in the slightest.

The Tudors

Goddammit, this show. I hate everything about it - the terrible acting, the worse writing, the eye-searing costumes, the shameless reaming of history - and yet somehow, I always get drawn back in, only to end up shouting obscenities at the screen. Call it morbid curiosity.

This paticular episode is the finale of the third season (how they got away with calling eight episodes "a season" remains a mystery) and, like the rest of the episodes, has no real plot to speak of. Henry is in the midst of divorcing Anne of Cleves in favour of Katherine Howard, Cromwell is facing the axe, and Mary Tudor is having a fling with Anne of Cleves's cousin Philip. No, really. Mary Tudor, who has gone down in history for her loathing of Protestantism is batting her eyelashes at a fucking Lutheran just because he tosses out lines like "'Ow could you step on my foot when your feet never touch ze floor?" I despair.

Legion

I know what you're thinking - I am a terrible person and am destined for the Special Hell for taking my cell phone into a movie theater. Ordinarily I would agree with you, but as I have the theatre almost entirely to myself (aside from the couple behind me who are making out and the old lady sleeping in the back row) I feel somewhat justified in leaving the phone on. Besides, it's on vibrate.

Oh, this movie. How do I describe this movie? It's kind of like Supernatural, only it doesn't loathe women, and it embraces its own terribleness. The basic plot is as follows: God, as the narrator informs us, is "tired of all the bullshit" so he sends a legion (geddit?) of angels to wipe out humanity. Fortunately for us, a waitress in a Nevada truck stop happens to be carrying a child that will Save Us All. They never really explain why the kid will save us all, but it will. So anyway, the angel Gabriel wants to kill the kid (God told him to, apparently) but the angel Paul Bettany Michael isn't having with that, so he heads on out to Nevada to protect the waitress and her unborn child. With machine guns. Oh yeah.

I really have no defense for liking this movie. I only have one reason for liking it, and that is Paul Bettany. I don't know what it is about that man's voice, but he somehow managed to make me forget about all of the movie's rampant stupidity the moment he opened his mouth. Newborn baby survived a car crash when a teenager didn't? Man dies from being hit with a ribcage? Evil Granny? Archangel Broody Yet Mansome over here'll deal with it. I don't think I've ever enjoyed so much stupidity so completely.

Just A Girl

I'm not sure if a YouTube video technically counts as "media" but nevermind. This paticular vid is brilliant - it captures everything I've ever wanted to say about the way BBC's Robin Hood treated its female lead. I've occasionally thought about writing an article on the subject, but it would inevitably have descended into a stream of gibbering rage and profanity, so I abandoned the idea. The vidder in this case helpfully circumvented that problem by presenting the case in images - and a powerful case it is. Strong recommended viewing, even if it is rage-inducing. (Which it is.)